Healthy Relationships 101

Interpersonal relationships make up every relationship that fulfills a range of physical and emotional needs for you. This can include intimate partners, parents, siblings, friends, neighbors, and even the bus or delivery driver.

You have some kind of relationship with everyone you know. Given the importance of relationships to our emotional and physical well-being, it’s necessary to learn how to develop and maintain them.

Starting and maintaining healthy relationships

Maintaining friendships and other relationships takes work. Establishing limits and roles within the relationship is an important first step. Here is a list of tips to begin and keep your relationships in good emotional shape:

1) Honesty

Being truthful with yourself and others is not always easy.

2) Use assertive communication

Be open about your needs and wants, and speak up when appropriate.

3) Establish and maintain boundaries

Know when to say ‘no’, and learn to accept ‘no’ from others. Share personal information in an appropriate way that matches the strength of the relationship. For example, you may tell your best friend your deepest, darkest secrets but not your delivery driver.

4) Be an active listener

Pay attention to what the other person is communicating, and seek understanding before developing a response.

5) Show the other person respect at all times

Avoid name-calling, sarcasm, inappropriate gestures or comments, put-downs, humiliation or manipulation.

6) Maintain a positive attitude by using positive self-talk

Be open to constructive criticism and feedback without letting your emotions take over. Look at what others might be trying to communicate to you instead of focusing on how it makes you feel.

7) Consider the long view

Be willing to look at how a relationship may develop or change.

Takeaways

Interpersonal relationships touch all aspects of our lives, including home, work, and leisure activities. Without strong relationships, it’s possible to feel lonely, disconnected and undervalued as a person. You may also feel that you’re lacking social support in times of need.

Finally, you can’t build interpersonal relationships if you don’t have a good relationship with yourself. Take time to get to know yourself and also invest in self-love.

This article is co-authored by:

Lauren Teets, Counselor in Training (CT) and Julie Didion, PCC-S. Lauren is currently a student at Cleveland State University and is interning at Firelands as part of Master’s in Counseling Program.

Julie is a program coordinator who oversees mental health therapy services at Firelands in Erie County. Julie has 14 years of experience in the behavioral health field with expertise in the diagnosis and treatment of mental health problems in adults and youth.